The Dreaded Green Bean Sandwich
by Marcipie
Summary: Stitch decides to try a new course for a midnight snack and ends up falling on his face in a lesson he'll never forget. OneShot. Very Random. R&R Please!


**The Dreaded Green Bean Sandwich**

**By The Sole Survivor**

"And now welcome back to _America's Most Embarrassing Moments_!" A loud, announcer's voice echoed throughout the Pelekai household. The only living beings listening to it, was the little blue experiment, 626, or more formally known as Stitch, and Lilo Pelekai. She and Stitch was having the most boring day ever.

Don't take it the wrong way, Stitch was glad that everybody; and everybody meaning Lilo and Nani, accepted him into their home. Lilo felt a bit of calming reassurance too, that Nani had welcomed Stitch. They both felt they had a real family now, especially with Stitch's creator, Jumba and the noodle-looking, one-eyed one, Pleakley. All of his wishing paid off, and he couldn't be happier. He smiled in content as he relaxed on the couch. Lilo glanced over at him, and grinned the happiest grin she could muster. Stitch looked so calm, so serene. As Stitch watched the colorful images as they progressed on the screen, it somehow made him remember the days when he was at the Galactic Federation on Turo.

That was when he was bad.

"Stitch.. good now." He muttered in reassurance to himself, his ears floating downward.

He knew that.

Lilo frowned when she noticed Stitch's body tense. And what was real noticable about his sudden fallen mood were his ears. It was one of those things that you could sense.

A smile once again making it's way across the blue experiment's face, he thought back to when he first met Lilo. Afterall, he was only thinking about destruction at the time, doing whatever his programming had told him to do. He had no idea that the little girl he'd taken as his shield, would three days later be his best friend in the world.

And his owner, if he dared to think about that.

_I hope Stitch is happy here, now that he finally has a family. _Lilo thought as she still side-glanced at her buddy, afraid she'd be caught in the act.

Not that she'd know. She never knows what Stitch looks at, for he has no pupils.

Stitch being lost in his thoughts, didn't notice the show go to commercial. He was content living with the Pelekai's. Although it did take some time for Nani to get comfortable around him after all he did. She did seem to get over that right after the Grand Council Woman had exiled him to Earth, though, because she patted his head when Lilo hugged him. Then again, she did whack him with a branch.

Twice.

Even though it did hurt, he still didn't blame her. He understood what she had been feeling, and having to throw her anger at something, she turned to the creature for being responsible.

"Oh, it looks like this family needs more protection when going ice skating!" The announcer guy shouted in glee. The show having obviously come back from commercial, a scene played with a family of four ice skating in a very awkward line. The father didn't look too steady as his wife was hugging his waist, their two girls were hugging the mother's legs. Making it almost impossible to skate perfectly, and they ended up crashing into the wall, painfully. The father taking most of the heat, the mother having fallen backwards, squashing her daughters. The audience, Stitch and Lilo, who had both finally taken interest in the show, laughed at the family's expense. Clapping his paws together, he bounced up and down in excitement, his ears flying behind him, then going straight up. Lilo laughed a little at the pained expression on the father's face.

As he thought about it, he and Lilo were the only ones in the house at the moment. David and Nani had gone to the movies, while Jumba and Pleakley were in the ship, working on something to benefit the house.

Whatever that meant.

Getting bored with the show, he shut it off and jumped off the couch, literally tossing the remote behind him on the couch.

"Where you going, Stitch?" Lilo asked, sort of annoyed he'd shut it off without even acknowledging she was still watching.

Pausing in mid-step, he realized something important.

"Stitch hungry." He said aloud then continued his journey into the kitchen. Blinking in confusion, she rolled her eyes but smiled and jumped off the couch behind him. Grinning like a mad dog, he dashed in the kitchen and headed straight for the fridge. Flinging it open, he searched it's contents. Only finding peanut butter, a couple of bananas, some jelly with the lid missing, milk that looked way past the expiration date, and some butter, he stuck out his tongue in disgust, closing the door slowly.

"What, nothing good enough?" He heard Lilo ask. Turning his head, he saw Lilo grinning smugly, leaning against the table leg.

Just watching him as he searched for food.

Growling softly, his lip curling, he turned and began sniffing around.

Lilo giggled.

She knew he'd never hurt her intentionally, so she felt free to express herself openly, and to tease him when necessary.

Her eyes followed him as he opened cabinets and drawers until he came across the pantry door. Opening it, he found cans with pictures of food on them. Growing confused, he grabbed a random can and used his nail to cut a hole in the top. Juice leaked out and a green ..something quickly popped out into the open air like a drowing cat would be clawing for air. Stitch blinked and pulled it out, inspecting it.

Sniffing it, he grinned. He knew just what to make. Lilo blinked in confusion, her smile disappearing.

"What are you thinking..?"

----

About an hour and a half later, Stitch turned from the stove with a plate to admire his work. There, sitting on the plate before him, was a green bean sandwich that was shaped like a doughnut. The bread had been crushed and molded to fit the shape, and the green beans were carved and stuffed within the bagel-shaped bread. Steam rose above it.

Sniffing it once more, he grinned to himself and hopped down from the counter. Stitch had no idea why, but he had had a craving for something like this.

Something obviously weird.

It was just something he was in the mood for, and if he liked it, he'd make another. Lilo, meanwhile, was having trouble absorbing the food that Stitch had prepared. Glancing at it warily, she sniffed it carefully.

"What gave you the idea to make **this**?" She asked, drawing back in shock.

He couldn't possibly have known the recipe for--

Shrugging, he blinked innocently at her reaction.

"Stitch try something new." He told her and let her look over his creation. He felt as if he were on display, holding a product for sale. As he thought about it, he'd never seen anything like this in restaurants.

He might even show Pleakley his recipe, since he was the one who was supposed to be the 'Earth expert', though if he wanted information on the planet, he'd go to Nani or Lilo.

Even Jumba would suffice.

Pleakley knew how to make a simple question into a lecture. Which literally made Stitch sleepy to listen to it.

Shrugging, he made his calm, careful walk back to the couch when he heard the door opening. Nani's excited voice and David's scent came into his senses. Grinning more widely, he scurried to enter the living room only to have forgotten one thing --

Although Nani and David looked happy to see him, they had failed to notice one thing too..

-- the plate of the green bean sandwich.

It seemed to have a mind of it's own. It suddenly seemed to take control over Stitch's body, and as he lost control over his footing, he slid and the plate went flying ahead of him. Experiment going one way, bean sandwich going the other, Stitch hit the wall while the plate took the sandwich out the door, sailing into the night. David closed the door slowly as the shock wore off.

"What happened?" Lilo ran into the room in shock, but upon inspecting the scene, she stopped and smirked. Her arms crossed in front of her snugly. She looked to David and Nani who blinked at her in confusion.

Silence filled the room. Slowly, Stitch slid down the wall and touched the floor. Groaning, he sat up and shook his head, turning to look at the couple that just entered the house. They stared at him. No emotion on their faces. He jumped up and looked around, searching for his sandwich that seemed to have vanished.

Suddenly, laughter erupted the entire room.

Three pairs of eyes turned to Nani, as she took in the scene before her and the memory of what she'd witnessed.

Slowly, Stitch's ears lowered to the floor and he grinned.

"Hey, Stitch, what was that you had?" David asked, thumbing behind him and out the door. Stitch thought on this and then ran around Nani and David to open the door.

Peering outside, he sniffed for a few seconds. Upon further realization, he noticed that his green bean sandwich was already being eaten by a bird.

"Stitch? How do you, of all people, trip running out of the kitchen? I thought you had sticky feet or something." Nani pondered, finally having recovered from her outburst at the experiment's expense. Stitch's ears lowered again, and he pointed to the kitchen, shutting the door behind him.

"Stitch was hungry. Meega go make sandwich, then trip coming out of kitchen." He stumbled over his words and rubbed his paws together in front of him.

"But, what did you make, Stitch?" Nani pressured, suddenly interested. The blue alien blinked and glanced back at Lilo.

The younger Pelekai walked foward and threw her arm around Stitch's shoulders.

"It's alright Nani. I think Stitch makes a fantastic addition to our family. He already mastered the evils of the green bean sandwich." Lilo finished, grinning widely as Nani's eyes widened. "Yup, Stitch is a regular ol' Nani. Aren't you?"

His ears lowering slightly, he blinked at her comment.

"Stitch not Nani." He said, which made Lilo burst out laughing, and then fall on her back from Nani's distraught expression.

"Stitch, don't ever make another green bean sandwich again." Nani mumbled, and threw a hand over her face.

David blinked in confusion.

"Wait, Nani, what happened with you and a green bean sandwich?" He asked, raising a hand, a finger pointed.

Sighing, Nani turned around and glanced at Stitch in what was almost a sympathetic look.

"Well, what happened was one day, I was making a green bean sandwich. It's a recipe I'd gotten from Mrs. Gaiben down the road. She told me it was a family secret, and that I should make it with care each time." Nani rolled her eyes at Lilo's look, but continued.

"So, one day, after having nothing else to eat, I decided to try it. So, I made it with care, and just as I was going to come back into the living room to watch television, I tripped over something and fell flat on my face. My sandwich disappeared too. I don't know where it went, but each time.. every time, I made a green bean sandwich, I would always trip over something, somewhere. I got fed up with it, and stopped making it." Nani finished, and rubbed her forehead with her index fingers. Lilo giggled.

"You would've thought that Nani'd get the message when the old lady started smirking." The young girl whispered to David and a smile took over his face as he realized this fact.

And to this day, they still won't let poor Stitch or Nani forget it.

**----**

**Author's Note: Yeap. Uh huh. I question my own sanity sometimes. But the reason for this? I actually have no reason.. but to be honest, the greenbean sandwich thing is true. Everytime my mom comes downstairs carrying one of those demons in bread, she falls. It's actually kinda funny, but I know it hurts. I know that if I would've spent some time on this, then I couldn't written it out better, but ehh. Easy come easy go. Moving on!**

**  
Disclaimer: I don't own Lilo, Stitch, Nani or David. Or any other characters I'd mentioned in here. **


End file.
